Body Check Count for June 25, 2008: 4
I don't understand something, maybe you can explain it to me: why is it so difficult for people to notice when they're blocking a sidewalk? And I mean completely blocking a sidewalk. No sidewalk to spare. Not an inch.
The first 3 body checks came in quick succesion 1, 2, 3. These were nearly inevitable due to the aformentioned Sidewalk Blockers. There was a group of tourists who had parked their mini bus on a side street that just happens to be beside the Metro. As these 15 or so people stood there thinking about other ways to make it difficult for me to get to work, 8 or so people came from the other direction attempting to head to the Metro from when I had just come. In a rather unfortunate series of events I managed to body check three of them. Since we were all in a hurry, no one said anything which is just as I like it: "Check and Run." (Akin to "Punch Him in The Face and Run" which is not dissimilar to "Park the Car and Run.")
Number 4 was a completely different story.
Number 4 was walking with Suit 1 and Suit 2 and was dressed in a nice pink dress. Like all Suits, 1 and 2 feel much bigger than they are and thus decided not to adjust their position on the sidewalk to allow Number 4 appropriate non-body-check space. Now, Number 4 could have slowed her pace or even quickened her pace to give space to myself and the other members of the working force who were on their way to work, but she chose to stay where she was: on the end of a 3-person line across the width of a 3-person sidewalk. It was an unfortunate set of circumstances that lead to her body check, but to quote Carlotta: these things do happen.
Now, for those of you out there who are asking "Well, why didn't YOU move, Ms. Body Check?" Simple: there was nowhere for me to go. And until I perfect the art of walking through trees and small brick walls, the body checks will keep coming.
The first 3 body checks came in quick succesion 1, 2, 3. These were nearly inevitable due to the aformentioned Sidewalk Blockers. There was a group of tourists who had parked their mini bus on a side street that just happens to be beside the Metro. As these 15 or so people stood there thinking about other ways to make it difficult for me to get to work, 8 or so people came from the other direction attempting to head to the Metro from when I had just come. In a rather unfortunate series of events I managed to body check three of them. Since we were all in a hurry, no one said anything which is just as I like it: "Check and Run." (Akin to "Punch Him in The Face and Run" which is not dissimilar to "Park the Car and Run.")
Number 4 was a completely different story.
Number 4 was walking with Suit 1 and Suit 2 and was dressed in a nice pink dress. Like all Suits, 1 and 2 feel much bigger than they are and thus decided not to adjust their position on the sidewalk to allow Number 4 appropriate non-body-check space. Now, Number 4 could have slowed her pace or even quickened her pace to give space to myself and the other members of the working force who were on their way to work, but she chose to stay where she was: on the end of a 3-person line across the width of a 3-person sidewalk. It was an unfortunate set of circumstances that lead to her body check, but to quote Carlotta: these things do happen.
Now, for those of you out there who are asking "Well, why didn't YOU move, Ms. Body Check?" Simple: there was nowhere for me to go. And until I perfect the art of walking through trees and small brick walls, the body checks will keep coming.
posted by ruehllin at 2:55 PM
2 Comments:
Lindsey SMASH!!!
Keep up the good work. Surprisingly I've run into similar problems myself. People seem to get in a zone where no one else exists but them. I've had people hit me with grocery carts when I was standing still. You'd think they'd notice a 6'2" 215lb guy standing there...
SMASH ON!!!
Even the giant that is me has, on occasion, run into people who are either:
1) In their "own little world"
2) Believe they are King or Queen of the world, and we all must bow to their will.
I also keep directly on my intended path. 99% of the time they will (at the very last second) realize that their personal space is about to be invaded by a 6'5" giant who has no intention of jumping out of their way... This usually leads to last second acts of extreme panic, and sometimes even gasps or small screams as they bail out of the way.
Even more sad are the 1% of macho men who seem to believe that their egos can somehow change the laws of physics. They "lay a shoulder into me" as best they can, and they bounce off like bugs off the windshield of a moving car. This is usually good fun for me, even if it sometimes makes me look like a bully.
I do not intentionally try to hog up sidewalks, elevators, or any public space... in fact, I am so aware of my size, that I usually go out of my way to try to reduce being inconvenient to others. HOWEVER, if you're going to try to force me to jump out of your way, you are in for a quick lesson in "size does matter".
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